My Heart Belongs to You, Little One

I'm linking up today with Bianca of Bits of Bee for her new Quotable Bits link up. Come on and join the fun!

Today I am preparing to register my son - my baby - for Kindergarten. KINDERGARTEN! Sigh.

Big snuggles this morning. I love our lazy starts. I'll register him for afternoons to hold onto them a little longer. It's too soon for full days. Grade 1 will be too soon for full days!

It's a good thing that the letting go is gradual. Baby steps. But no matter how gradual it is, I feel it. I feel his move towards independence. It's a good thing. The natural order. Still my heart aches with thoughts of 'losing him'.

He's my only one. There's a whole lot of me wrapped up in him.

Today's quote says it all:

 

Boy, did she nail that! That is exactly how I feel.

I understand completely why mamas want to have more kids at this stage. This is the stage when snuggles are fewer and farther between. We long to feel that closeness that we knew nothing of until the day our first child was born.

Bitter sweet. But the memories are enough to sustain me for the rest of my life. Had I not become a parent - even just the once - I would not have known that my heart could expand to hold so much more love. 

Though it's hard to believe it myself, it feels as though my heart grows with love for him each day. Elizabeth Stone's quote articulated something for me that until I read I only felt. Intensely. 

Take my heart with you little one, for though it aches to be separated from it and from you, I would have it no other way. My heart belongs to you.

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I'm also linking up with Lovelinks @FreeFringes,

a super cool place to hang out!

Stop by each week, link up a favourite post.

Come back the next day and vote for your favourites.

Work, work, work!

It's Monday Listicles time again with @NorthWestMommy.

This week Squashed Mom asked us to write about the Top Ten Strange (odd/unusual/funny/interesting) Jobs we have held in our lives. I don't know how interesting my previous jobs will be to others, but they have each, in their own unique ways, shaped who I am today.

1. I sold magazines - for one week! Worst. Job. Ever!

2. I worked at an auto glass company, answering phones and generally trying not to overhear what insurance rules were being broken by my sleezy boss.

3. I was a salad girl in two different restaurants. Actually had a lot of fun working in kitchens with some very quirky characters!

4. I was a hostess and later a head hostess. Oooh. Ahhh. I know!

5. I was waitress of both food and later cocktails. In that latter job position I referred to myself as a liquor prostitute, having had to dress up in a skirt and high heels to sell alcohol. Sometimes fun, most of the time just exhausting, but it paid some of my university bills... by which I mean it kept me in Mac 'n Cheese.

6. I worked for a fancy schmancy car credit company. Every time I told people who I worked for they would be totally impressed and ask if I drove one (mostly I said, No).

7. I greeted people at the university and told them where to go - right up my alley! :P

8. I worked as a peer counsellor at university. Great job. I love helping people. Can you tell by the fact that all of my jobs have been in the customer service industry?

9. I programmed computers and fixed them when they broke. Okay this one may not seem to be about customers, but it is. Everyone is your customer when you are in charge of the computers!

10. I'm a mom. Hardest job ever! Best. Job. Ever!

There you have it - my working life in a nutshell.

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Have a list of ten things?

Link it up!

Enjoy every single moment! Really? Even this one?

I just read an article entitled Don't Carpe Diem by Glennon of Momastery.com.

It's interesting to me that this article should come my way today (via @Deb_Bryan), having recently posted my One Word that I will focus on this year:

Moms, you've probably all experienced this. You're out with the kids, doing a little shopping, possibly looking a little frazzled - something to do with child A tormenting child B while child C empties the contents of your purse into a bin of rice in the bulk foods aisle. A nice (or perhaps not so nice) elderly lady looks at you knowingly and suggests that you, "Enjoy these moments. Enjoy every precious one. They'll soon be over. They grow up so fast!"

When this happens, I tend to recognize the comments as a wistful look back by the speaker. I try to see them as a gentle reminder of what is so wonderful about my kid at this age, and I try not to think of the millions of ways in which I am not Supermom and sometimes not as grateful and calm and patient and engaged and perfect as I might like to be. 

But... there are also days I would rather someone just commiserated with me than tell me I should be enjoying myself. It's wonderful - for these ladies - that they seem to remember only the joys. However, if they remembered at least some of the challenges perhaps they would be more considerate and more careful with their words. Glennon says: 

Being told, in a million different ways to CARPE DIEM makes me worry that if I’m not in a constant state of intense gratitude and ecstasy, I’m doing something wrong.

That really made me think. I do a lot of talking about gratitude myself, but the reality is sometimes reality just plain stinks.

I need to remember this when I am at that stage - when I pass through any life stage and feel the urge to give advice to someone at the beginning of it. I need to remember what it is like for me when someone else seems to know what's best for me, having 'been there'.

I just love what Glennon will say when she reaches that stage of reminiscence - when she sees a mom in the grocery store struggling to maintain order:

“It’s helluva hard, isn’t it? You’re a good mom, I can tell. And I like your kids, especially that one peeing in the corner. She’s my favorite. Carry on, warrior. Six hours till bedtime.”

Take the time to read Glennon's article. It's brilliant. She has some great suggestions for a modified version of the elderly lady plea to treasure every moment.

I also loved this comment from "Rachel":

yes, yes, yes!

I will never forget the time an older woman came over to me after I had left my grocery cart where it was and was physically manhandling my screaming, limp toddler out the door. She said (and in hindsight, she must have been yelling!!!), “one day, she’ll be all grown up and you’ll miss these days.”

REALLY??? this one? you think?

As I replied to Glennon: "...I have wondered if I am doing a good enough job – not just of parenting, but of life in general – if I am not enjoying myself at least most of the time. In fact, I’ve felt enough pressure around that sentiment that I selected REJOICE as a word to focus on this year. It can’t hurt to try to rejoice a little more in the glorious things that happen... [but]... while rejoicing more where there are things to be joyful about makes sense, reacting in natural ways to the things that aren’t so great is no failure."

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Do you enjoy every single moment of motherhood? 

How do you respond when people tell you that you should?

(I could use some witty retorts in case what happens to Rachel ever happens to me!)

2012: One Word

I first learned about the concept of adopting one word to focus on each year when Lisa of Shwartz Chronicles spoke about it. I love her 2011 word, "Move". Something I definitely need to do more of.

I was reminded of the one-word concept again earlier this week by Amanda of Lilahbility (have you chosen your word yet, Amanda?), and again today by Robin of Farewell Stranger who is also looking to adopt one word for 2012.

Last fall, I bought a few painted stones that spoke to me. Each one contained a word that I want to focus on.

I pondered them this morning and selected one.

Can you guess which one?

Here it is:

Why did I choose it? The others are just as important, but I'm making some progress with those. In my life now, there are many challenges. What I need most is to allow myself to rejoice in the fun and the joyful, and to recognize my accomplishments. Too often, I gloss over those things, not taking the time to celebrate them.

REJOICE! 

I have decided something else too. I am not meant to be a hand model, and I need to moisturize more often.

Have you chosen one word to focus on this year? 

What does that word mean to you?

Happy New Year! Resolutions: What I should do, and what I actually will do.

I'm back! I had a nice break with the family - punctuated by two flus and a cold. I took a break from my personal blog, but there was still LOTS going on at the book club.

If you're looking for e-books to load up that e-reader, iPhone or tablet you acquired over the holidays, visit Cookie's Book Club (the list of giveaways is at the top of the right sidebar). Some interesting guest posts too from some of my favourite 2011 independent authors!

I hope you all enjoyed the holidays and are slowly acclimatizing yourselves to the new year. Happy 2012!

I can't tell you how happy I am to usher in a new year. In our house we dubbed 2011 'The Year of the Cold'. We had a minimum of twelve colds and flus last year (I lost track towards the end). In fact, 2011 went out with one final hurrah, as our tiny human woke up early on December 31st with the flu. Suddenly, today, January 1st of a brand new year, he is miraculously well. I've spent the morning feeling grateful and hopeful while at the same time crossing all of my digits and knocking on everything made of wood.

BOTB is on hiatus! See you at the end of January.

Just a quick post to let you know that the Best of the Blogosphere link up is on a break. There will be no BOTB post and linky for December 2011 (you may have already deduced that since here it is January).

Start noting your favourite reads this month (I keep track of mine in a draft post), and come back at the end of January to link up your list!

Happy New Year! All the best in 2012!