It's Monday Listicle time again with NorthWest Mommy.
Before we get to this week's listicle, I have the pleasure of announcing next week's listicle topic. I feel like I won a pageant or something! Hon? Where's my tiara? Ah, there we go.
My sister thinks you should all write a list of Ten Reasons you Want to be Scottish - we Scots apparently think quite highly of ourselves - but I fear that would alienate a few non-Scots. So... we'll go with my second-best idea which is Ten Tips for New Moms.
This listicle idea comes to mind as my neighbour welcomes a newborn into her home. Do you remember what those first few days, weeks and months were like? Remember how when you were pregnant people would say, "Is this your first?" and then smile, nod and coo as if you were entering the most blissful time of your life? Do you remember what it ACTUALLY was like and how you cursed these women for never telling it like it is? Well, here's your chance to inform the next set of moms. Have fun with it. Your listicle has the potential to be very helpful and/or bloody hilarious!
This week's listicle topic, Ten Guilty Pleasures, is courtesy of Chicktuition. If you haven't checked out her blog yet, do it! She's a little nutty (in a good way), highly sarcastic, and not afraid to tell it like it is. She's all of the things I'm only brave enough to be when I'm either drunk or hungover, except today. Today I am very bravely sharing things I would not normally share (I'd really rather you all thought of me as the kind, helpful, well-adjusted citizen I am MOST of the time, and not the neurotic and needy mom this post will make me out to be). No, I am not hungover today - I may, or may not, be drinking right now. Which brings me to my list of guilty pleasures.
Ten of my Guilty Pleasures (sadly. yes, this is just a subset)
1) The occasional overindulgence in alcohol. Please don't judge. After all it's not like you've never had a drink (or seven) and had so much fun that you neglected certain adult responsibilities, along with any sense of logic or reason, and woke up at 4:00 am passed out in a bathtub, right? No? Really? Just me then? Okay, that's embarassing... I swear that only happened the once. I don't overindulge very much these days (though I may make an exception for the #MotherOfAllTweetups). I have more important adult responsibilities now (and at my age, the hangovers are brutal)!
2) Survivor. Twenty-two seasons so far (the twenty-third is in progress), times about fifteen hour-long episodes plus a two-hour finale per season adds up to.... a colossal waste of time. Yet, I can not turn away. As I remarked to a friend recently, I never turn to gawk at traffic accidents. Maybe this is my thing.
3) Dessert. I just finished breakfast and can't get my mind off of the pumpkin pie sitting on my kitchen counter. Dessert items call to me. They taunt me. They know my weaknesses: chocolate, caramel, vanilla, cream... It doesn't help that I'm on a cleanse right now. Everything that I see reminds me of dessert. My husband is hiding from me, because just a few minutes ago I was chasing him with a fork and a bottle of whipped cream.
4) Blogging/Facebook/Twitter and Social Media in general. These things are such massive time sucks, but they're also highly rewarding... and thus addictive. Yes, I'm aware that much of the social media world is designed to feed a need for validation and connection with others, and yes, I'm aware that these things are available to me through my friends and family IRL (that's "in real life" for you real lifers). But I've met some great tweeps, I love to "share", and ultimately... I just can't help myself. Guilty!
5) Stealth mornings. Also known as waking up just a little later than everyone else and catching up with my favourite blogging tweeps while my husband and son entertain themselves unaware that I am awake. Of course, if hubby reads this entry the cat will be out of the bag. But I think I can still pull it off. [Edited to add: Hubby read my post and said, "Ya, I already knew about that." Cat. Out of bag. Bummer.]
6) Staying in my pajamas all day. This one doesn't happen as often anymore either. The busy life of a mom means there are always places to go and people to see. But when the opportunity presents itself, I am not going to miss it! I enjoy not having to put makeup on or even comb my hair, just every now and again.
7) Shopping. Not that revealing? I suppose many of us like shopping, but the reason it's guilt-inducing for me is that I have been known to use it as an escape from the mundane life of at-home-motherhood. I should be doing something else, like cleaning my house, but instead I find some reason that a shopping excursion is more pressing. A light bulb burned out and we're out of light bulbs?! Sounds like a shopping emergency to me!
8) Video games. Yet another thing that I have no time for these days, but given a week to myself I might just spend most of it playing games on the XBox. It's happened before, not since Jack was born, but it will happen again. The only reason I am looking forward to the teen years is so that Jack and I can spend some quality time slouched on the couch kicking alien butt together. Weird. I know.
9) Carbs in general. It's not just desserts that I crave. I love bread, especially raisin bread - it's like dessert! Muffins, english muffins, bagels scones... you name it. If it's made from a grain, with even a hint of sweetness, I'm all over it.
10) TV in general. I mentioned my Survivor addiction. Sadly, it doesn't end there. This one is last because it's probably the hardest to admit. I... am in love with my television. Alright, I may be exaggerating a tad. What do you think? I currently have 10 shows sitting on my PVR from this past week alone. Guilty? I suppose so.
BONUS: 11) Monday Listicles. It's true. I am addicted to these lists. Writing them. Reading them. I can't get enough!
Now if you don't mind I need to wrap this up. My TV is calling me. Coming, sweetheart!!
Wow! I really feel like I've opened up to all of you. That was very therapeutic. I actually forgot for a bit about this cleanse that I'm on and... aw, dang. Honey? Is there any more cake?