What would I rather do? Oh... about a million things.

This week's #MondayListicle, hosted by Stasha at NorthWest Mommy, is an absolute breeze for me to write. The topic, suggested by Wendy of Twisted Domestic Goddess, is 10 things I would rather do than clean the house. To be honest, the list of things that I would dislike doing more than cleaning the house would be far, far shorter. I am just not the domestic goddess that Wendy is.

Before I get to my listicle, a reminder:

If you haven't already, be sure to enter my Blogiversary giveaway! I made something special as a token of my gratitude for the support you have all given me during my first year of blogging. And if you own a Kindle or other e-reader, enter the Cookie's Book Club Blogiversary giveaway too!

And now, an un-ode to house cleaning.

1. I would rather play Crazy Eights for three solid hours than clean the house.

2. I would prefer to be arrested, but only temporarily (no jail time, if you please), than clean the house.

3. I would rather be waxed from head to toe than clean the house. Wait! Let me amend that slightly given my hair-vanity. I would rather be waxed from eyebrow to toe than clean the house.

4. If a man came to my door and wanted to talk to me for an hour about Jesus or the organic, free-range chicken he is selling out of the back of his truck, and my pretending to listen and feigning interest would get me out of cleaning the house, I'd do it.

5. I'd rather walk in a blizzard than clean the house. I kid you not.

6. I would rather write a ten page essay on the subject of dryer lint than clean the house. (I would not like to meet the person that would find said essay interesting.)

7. I would much prefer giving a 25 minute speech (you may recall my fear of public speaking) based on my ten page dryer lint essay than clean the house.

8. I'd rather skydive from a very high height than clean the house. Some say I have a fear of heights. Not true. I quite like heights - so majestic - so... high. It's plummeting to my death that I'm not a big fan of.

9. I would rather listen to Kim Kardashian - or some other equally talentless, yet famous, spiritually empty individual - whine about how hard done by she is than clean my house... but just by a hair.

10. Finally, when asked this question, my husband replied, "I would rather jump naked into a vat of pork fat than clean the house."

I did manage to think of a few things that I would rather not do than clean the house, but it was a challenge!

1. I would rather clean the house than eat blue cheese. It's just that disgusting to me!

2. I would rather clean my house than a public bathroom. Well, duh.

3. I would rather suck it up and stop being such a princess and clean the &$%# house than not have the luxury of such a lovely house in the first place.

So there you have it. I think it's clear that I am not a fan of housecleaning, as if that had not already been established.

Thanks Wendy! That was a hoot!

Have a fabulous week everyone!

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Have a list of ten things? Link it up!